What Is Fair?

What a juvenile concept this is!
A Utopian theory for the simple minded
And easily forgot.
Justice exists not in our lives-
But only in the desperate delusions and
Childish fantasies we cling to
With our fingernails and teeth.

Dear God please exist!
I fear it is only divine power,
Or coincidence,
That can deliver what I beg.

I laugh not from humor-
Only from the darkness left in me.
Wallowing in it’s own mire,
It is all that can thrive in this absence.
Acceptable to the wicked,
Battled in vain by the righteous.
Am I going mad?

No, I refuse this undeniable reality;
It cannot be so.
Unknown words of honesty and merit
Must survive outside the innocent.
I can feel it as it dies and grows.